A Providing Father

For many weeks now I, Brian, have agonized over what I need to do in light of the Covid virus. I have been conflicted and torn between my responsibilities. As a husband and father, God has blessed me with a wife and 5 children that I need to take care of. As a new missionary on the field, my heart is to serve and as a believer in Christ, I need to take care of God’s people. For weeks, I have sought the Lord, His direction, and guidance, earnestly pleading for Him to release this ongoing battle in my mind. As I prayed, sacrificing to the Lord everything I am (husband, father, son of God), I felt the Lord was leading our family back to the States for a short time, possibly a month or two. This decision was not easy nor was it taken lightly.

In Nicaragua, the virus rates are increasing exponentially,  the hospitals and morgues are at full capacity, safety measures are not put into practice by the government, and many people are dying. In addition, much like the United States, Nicaraguan hospitals established a protocol that only allows the patient in the hospital.  As a father, this greatly concerned me; not necessarily that we would get Covid, but if one of my children was injured or needed any kind of healthcare;  they would have to stay in the hospital alone, with limited knowledge and understanding of language and culture. I wrestled with the thought of leaving my kids alone in a third world hospital, in a medical facility, not knowing the language.

So as I prayed and sought the Lord, asking for God to help me make the decision of what to do as I lead my family. My heart cried out, “is the desire to protect my family wrong, how do I walk in obedience using wisdom, but also living a life of faith?” As my heart yearned for His ways to be my ways; He gave me the answer, not the one I was looking for, but He began to lead me to bring my family back to the States for a brief furlough. It was hard to accept this reality and honestly, I was confused. We have been trying to get to the mission field for 8 years, and now He is telling me to come back for a short time. Even though I was confused, God then showed me He is the provider we all need to turn to; providing all the necessary things to get us back stateside. The Lord made a way, where there seemed to be no way and we landed in the States a week ago. As a husband, father and a follower of Christ, I am called to be the hands and feet wherever He plants our family.  As we continue to seek His will, we will take this time to be used by Him, however He chooses, until we return to Nicaragua.